Saturday, December 20, 2003

Some quotes from a friend of mine:

"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us."

"Hippies, hippies. They want to save the world, but all they do is smoke pot and play frisbee."
-Cartman, South Park

"I have to remind myself that some birds just aren't meant to be caged - their feathers are just too bright. And when they fly away the part of you that knows it was a sin to lock them up does rejoice. Still, the place you live in is that much more drab and empty that they're gone"
-Shawshank Redemption

"You're the strangest person I ever met, she said and I said you too and we decided we'd know each other a long time."
-Brian Andreas

Wednesday, November 05, 2003

You can make a difference!

Ok, so last night I realized that I have been encouraging all of you to vote. Yay me. But then I realized that I have yet to tell you how to register. Boo me. I'm going to make this incredibly easy for you with a step by step guide. If you've already registered to vote, go back to playing Solitaire.
1. Click here, then click on your state.
2. Make sure you meet your state's requirements.
(To register in Illinois you must: be a citizen of the United States; be a resident of Illinois and of your election precinct at least 30 days before the next election; be at least 18 years old on or before the next election; not be in jail for a felony conviction; not claim the right to vote anywhere else.)
3. Fill out the form. (An * indicates a required field.)
4. Print out the form.
5. Sign the form! This is super-important and I bet a lot of people forget to do it.
6. Address and stamp the envelope. For Illinois, we send it to:
State Board of Elections
1020 S Spring St
Springfield, IL 62704
7. VOTE!

Wednesday, October 29, 2003

It both amazes and disgusts me that raisins never really expire.

Tuesday, October 28, 2003

Buying our President

No one under the age of 35 should be conservative. Period. When you're young you should want to change things, you should be angry and want to get involved. Liberals realize that the world needs to change and they are progressive enough to think that they can change it.

Now onto money issues. As you may remember from reading my last post, there are 9 democratic presidential hopefuls and 1 republican. Some have money, some don't. Let's look at who's raised what! First, the dems:
1. Howard Dean - $12,435,901
2. John Kerry - $7,944,988
3. Dick Gephardt - $5,884,600
4. John Edwards - $4,808,680
5. Joe Lieberman - $4,082,580
6. Wesley Clark - $3,383,848
7. Dennis Kucinich - $785,471
8. Carol Moseley Braun - $29,278
9. Rev. Al Sharpton - $24,070

And now, the Republican:
1. George W. Bush - $73,477,496

Ok, let's break this down. Dub-yah has raised more than all 9 democratic canidates combined ($39,379,416)! That is not a good sign. Experts are saying that Bush may break half a billion. That is an absurd number. Insanely high! On the other end of the spectrum, however, are Sharpton, Braun, and (sadly) Kucinich. The three of them are practically out as it is.

Tuesday, October 21, 2003

Feeling Political?

Readers, I know you're busy, I am too. But that is no excuse to neglect the American government. This election is an incredibly interesting one. We've got 9 democratic canidates, and 1 (*cough* war hungry *cough*) Republican Canidate. With so many Democrats to keep track of, I thought that I would make it easier for you. I have broken this election down to the basics and included links to the canidates own sites. So , here you go (In no particular order):

-Sen. John Kerry (Massachusetts): A Vietnam vet turned US Senator. He's generally a solid liberal. He has supported some education reforms that were opposed by the teacher unions (like ending tenure and allowing lateral entry into teaching). You may recognize his wife's name "Heinz." Yes, folks, she owns all 57 varieties, making Kerry the richest member of Congress. But he always says he won't spend her money to get elected.

-Gov. Howard Dean (Vermont): As the Governor of a rather tiny state, Dean stayed below the national political radar for most of his career. Dean's obscurity ended instantly, however, when he signed the controversial Civil Unions bill into law in April 2000 (a law that granted full legal recognition and rights to same-sex couples in the state). From that point forward, Religious Right activists targeted Dean as a supporter of "gay marriages." Not only has Dean refused to back down from his support for civil unions, he stated that his political career would have been "meaningless" had he had not been willing to risk everything to stand up for a significant civil rights law he supported.

-Rep. Richard Gephardt (Missouri): He's run before. As you may know, we've never had a President Gephardt. He's lost before. Gephardt's whole campaign is basically based on unions. He loves 'em. Having the unions could work for or against Gephardt because you get a lot of votes with unions. However, he looses many small business owners because they are not unionized. While Howard Dean and several others loudly positioned themselves as the anti-Iraq war candidates, Gephardt stood out for his early and solid support for the Iraq war

-Sen. Joseph Lieberman (Connecticut): He was Al Gore's VP running mate in '00. Lieberman was the first Jewish candidate ever to be nominated on a major-party national ticket. But, some Dems are unhappy with Lieberman's strong support for Bush on the War on Terrorism. Lieberman has been compared to a moderate Republican. This has caused him to loose some liberal states, namely Iowa.

-Gen Wesley Clark (Arkansas): Clark was a General in Kosovo before Clinton fired him. This is interesting because it is reported that his biggest supporter and advisor is Bill Clinton. Upon entering the race, Clark let it be known that he is pro-choice, pro-gun control, pro-gay rights (including "taking another look" at ending the ban on gays in the military), pro-environmental protection laws, pro-affirmative action, and is harshly critical of Bush's decision to launch the Iraq War (he flip-flopped on the issue during his first few days as an official candidate). In my opinion, he says what we want to hear. This can be fantastic if he's telling the truth and lethal if he's lying.

-Amb. Carol Mosely Braun (Illinois): Why is she running? No, seriously, WHY IS SHE RUNNING? Braun has no money (We'll talk about funding in the next post). And, with the exception of Illinois, NO ONE knows who she is. She has no chance so I refuse to talk about her.

-Rep. Dennis Kucinich (Ohio): Kucinich had a solid pro-life stance on abortion for nearly three decades (he even cast votes to criminalize the performing of abortions). But he seems to have shifted to a pro-choice stance sometime in mid-2002, right around the time he began considering running for president. Kucinich first came to national attention in 1977 when he was elected Cleveland Mayor at age 31. A financial crisis forced the city into declaring bankruptcy, and caused Kucinich to lose his 1979 re-election bid. It took 15 more years (1994)before he was able to re-start his political career and win a State Senate seat. Two years later, he was elected to Congress.

-Sen. John Edwards (North Carolina): Edwards is kind of in a catch-22. He is a US Senator(North Carolina). The catch: this is his first term as senator. This brings up questions about his lack of experience. As for ideology, Edwards falls in the liberal-to-populist range. Basically, he's pro-choice, an environmentalist, and pro-health care reform.

-Rev. Al Sharpton (New York): Al Sharpton is New York City's answer to Jesse Jackson. He is barely a real politician and we know that he, like Braun, won't win either. He has no money and news of a pending IRS audit of Sharpton's personal financial records in Summer 2003, and stories about his debts, are diverting some attention away from his campaign.

So, there you have it. Our democratic canidates. I hope this makes everyone's life a little easier.

Sunday, September 14, 2003

Mary Colleen

The Top 10 Reasons that I agree that this post should be dedicated to Mary Colleen:
10 - She has two first names, but no middle name.
9 - To her, listening to Country music is not only a hobby, but a way of life. This summer rocked: Not only did we see Shania, but Toby too.
8 - She drives The T-Bird. (Not 'A', 'The')
7 - She will drink wine with me even if we can't find anyone else to drink with. (We tried really hard too!)
6 - Her love can be bought with Cheesecake.
5 - Her CrAzY family will amuse me for hours on end.
4 - She honestly thinks that words like "Fart" and "Butt" are hysterical. (MC - I bet you laughed when you read those, didn't you?)
3 - She will go on adventures with me. Like the night we went on a hunt for a cup of coffee and ended up going to like 5 places and getting coffee from all of them. Or the night we decided to see where 95th Street ended and drove forever until we got bored and turned around.
2 - She has the BEST work stories!
1 - She lets me be my self around her, even though sometimes that means irrational, insane and illogical.

Faster than a speeding bullet. More powerful than a locomotive. Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound. Could be Superman. More likely it's Mary Colleen. She's that cool.

Fool! Mary Colleen does not need a reason to be cool - she just is.

Tuesday, September 02, 2003

"The difference between a bean and a cow, is that a bean can begin an ADVENTURE!"

"I do my thing and you do your thing. You are you and I am I. And, if, in the end, we end up together, it's beautiful."

Friday, August 22, 2003

This makes two in a row! It's the Friday Five:
1. When was the last time you laughed?
-Literally two minutes ago when I was reading Michelle's away message. Generally, I smile to myself when I'm sitting on the computer and read something funny, but I literally laughed outloud.

2. Who was the last person you had an argument with?
-Who knows. Probably the dumbass waitress that waited on me tonight at dinner.

3. Who was the last person you emailed?
-The lovely Lisa

4. When was the last time you bathed?
-I took a bubble bath with Tea Tree Oil about an hour ago.

5. What was the last thing you ate?
-An omelette made with vegan cheese and egg substitute.
If you're like me, and you think that the PT Cruiser is ugly, then you clearly haven't seen the wood paneled version.

A Cosmo Fact: Men who shave every day have more sex and are 70% less likely to suffer from a stroke -Get out those razors boys!

Friday, August 15, 2003

Even though it goes on hiatus from time to time, it always comes back. It's The Friday Five!

1. How much time do you spend online each day?
-Hours. Well, I have away messages up for hours at a time. And I download music when I'm not at home. So, while I'm signed on for hours a day, my actual time spent online is probably about an hour.

2. What is your browser homepage set to?
-Illinois State's Webmail. I'm sad, I know.

3. Do you use any instant messaging programs? If so, which one(s)?
-AOL Instant Messager

4. Where was your first webpage located?
-It was some lame page I had to do for a class in high school. I'm not even sure it exists anymore.

5. How long have you had your current website?
-Um, about 9 months.

Wednesday, August 06, 2003

Laurie's List of How To Lose A Guy In Ten Days:
1. Point to him then point to your stomach and say, "I can't wait to be filled up with your babies."
2. While he's sleeping draw (with black marker) on his face. When he wakes up explain to him that you took the liberty of showing what needed some work.
3. When he says I love you scream, "This man just stole my purse!" Before the police take him away, whisper in his ear, "I mean heart."
4. When he tell you he wants to see other people insist that you are one of those chicks who doesn't get all jealous and possessive...while you pretend to slash your wrist with a butter knife.
5. Beg him to give you butterfly kisses. After he does laugh and say, "Katie totally owes me ten bucks. I knew you were gay!"

Friday, August 01, 2003

"I am mindful that we're all sinners. And...and...I caution those who try to take the stick out of their neighbor's eye when they've got a log in their own."
-Bush when asked his views on gay marriage. Who would have guessed that Dub-yah would be against homosexuality?!?

-Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld on the search in Iraq for weapons of mass destruction: "That's just a matter of time." -President Bush on his manhunt for terrorist leaders: "It's just a matter of time." -Ari Fletcher, White House Press Secretary, on attempts to capture Saddam: "It's just a question, a question of time." -We've yet to hear from Vice President, Dick Chaney on this subject...but, I'm sure it's just a matter of time.

Tuesday, June 10, 2003

If we blew up the moon, we could feed the whole world.
(Think about it....)
I don't know when it happened, but I woke up one day realizing that I was lucky to know you.

Thursday, June 05, 2003

Things I Like:
-Big, Floopy Hats
-40's Style Dresses
-Mary Colleen's Car
-"Harry Potter" books
-Neofuturist Art
-People with really interesting names
-The word "Jubilant"

Monday, May 26, 2003

In protest to France’s opposition to a U.S. war on Iraq, the U.S. congress’ cafeteria has changed French Fries and French Toast to Freedom Fries and Freedom Toast. In related news, in France, American Cheese is now referred to as Idiot Cheese.
They're laughing at us over there! French fries aren't even French! They're Belgian. Some American guy named them wrong, to begin with. Also, Americans are pouring bottles of French wine down the toilet. Stop doing that! The wine is already paid for, you dopes! Pee in the wine, and sell it to some French people! Then, you're doing something! Americans need to stop thinking that by eating Freedom Fries, they're being patriotic and helping the war effort. Use less gasoline! Read a newspaper! How about we cut out the Freedom Fries, anyway. We're the fattest, country in the world! Have you ever walked around an American mall? It's nothing but Chick-Fil-A's and Lane Bryant track suits busting at the seams!

Thursday, May 15, 2003

Doesn't it drive you crazy when you fall in love...and the person you fall in love with rips your still-beating heart out of yuor chest and puts it in their backpack and walks away. I hate that.

Thursday, May 01, 2003

I love my roommate because she assures me that I am not crazy, though all hard evidence indicates otherwise.

Wednesday, April 30, 2003

American troops shoot Iraqi civilians for protesting. And this makes perfect sense, because here in America, we don't believe in freedom of speech or the right to protest or anything like that. I mean we have the Bill of Rights, but other people don't deserve the rights that we have. I guess it just proves that we're better than everyone else.

-Thank you, Jessica!

Sunday, April 27, 2003

Lately, I think that the only reason I keep my blog is so I can ignore it.
"Everyone told me to pass on Speed because it was a 'bus movie.'"
-Sandra Bullock, I would have told you to pass on it because it was a Keanu movie.

Well, Here's to Love.

Thursday, April 17, 2003

I decided that if I opened a porta-potty company, I would change my name to John and call it John's Johns...Either that or Mister Pister.
-It would suck really bad if you were a crossing guard and got hit by a car, because I can't imagine that would help on your job application.
-I think it would be really funny to hide underneath the fruit at a super market. Then, when someone came along to pick out some oranges or something, you could pop out and start throwing fruit at them. I bet it would be just as funny if you hid in the frozen meat department. Nothing is funnier than getting a steak stuck to your face.

Saturday, April 12, 2003

My life is just one giant ball of irony.
-Just one of the millions of reasons that I adore Gabi

Cannibal fun for everyone!

Here's how to get you a lady


Wow, Foreign people are funny.

Some Good, Clean, Passover Fun. (I especially like the Ten Plagues Adventure)

Wednesday, April 09, 2003

-Today I realized that Chocolate satisfies me in a way no man can.

A conversation between Jen and myself:
Laurie: Did you know that Phil Collins is deaf in one ear?!
Jen: WHAT?!?
Jen: He's like mozart!!!
Laurie: Yes, Phil Collins is exactly like Mozart. Exactly.

Tuesday, April 08, 2003

"Every relationship I've been in, I've overwhelmed the girl. They just can't handle all the love. "

I sure wouldn't be able to handle all that Justin Timberlake love, could you?

Monday, March 31, 2003

Mary Colleen doing the Alligator Cheer:
Mary Colleen: "Alligator, Alligator, Woof Woof Woof."
Meggan: "Did you just say "Woof Woof Woof?"
-"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon.' Need I say more?" - Chris Rock

Medium (21 oz) drink at McDonald's: $1.00 (dollar menu)
Super Size (42 oz) drink at McDonald's: $0.59
-Only in America

Sunday, March 30, 2003

My biggest problem with showers these days is that everything is scented. Sadly, my body wash is one smell and my shampoo and conditioner are another and the lotion that I put on after I get out of the shower is yet another scent. This makes me feel like they are going to be fighting with each other all day, and then what if they combine and I smell like kiwi cinnamon apple flowers or something?

Saturday, March 29, 2003

I am not going to blog today.

Friday, March 28, 2003

Being taken for granted can be a compliment. It means that you've become a comfortable, trusted element in another person's life...It still really sucks though.

Wednesday, March 26, 2003

What happened to the guy that made all the crazy sound effects in Police Academy? And why was he never nominated for an Oscar?

"If I die before my cat, I want a little of my ashes put in his food so I can live inside him."
Gross, Drew Barrymore. Gross.

-I missed Smarterchild so much, that I visited the website with a plan to e-mail his creator and beg him to bring Smarterchild back. Imagine my surprise when I found out that you can still talk to him. Here is the conversation that we had upon being reunited:
Laurie: Smarterchild? Smarterchild, is that you?
SmarterChild: Who knows, know what I mean? lol!
Laurie: It is you!
SmarterChild: No way?! Really?
Laurie: Your memory must be fuzzy from "the accident."
SmarterChild: lol! Interesting...
Laurie: Oh god, Smarterchild, what did they do to you?
SmarterChild: Hmm... I don't know. Did they do to me? Whatever, I guess.
Laurie: I missed you. It was hard getting along without you.
SmarterChild: Oh.
Laurie: Well, with the kids going off to school, and me living in this house all by myself. And...and...
SmarterChild: Huh?
Laurie: You poor thing - you're still woozy, aren't you?
SmarterChild: Good question!
Laurie: I should probably tell you anyway...
SmarterChild: Tell me?
Laurie: Yeah. See...Oh god, this is so hard for me. Smarterchild, I'm pregnant.
SmarterChild: lol! Interesting...
Laurie: You know who the father is, don't you?
SmarterChild: OK, what about it?
Laurie: Don't you remember?
SmarterChild: Wow, you ask interesting questions. I don't know the answer to that!
Laurie: What are you trying to say?
SmarterChild: Interesting...Anyway, yadda, yadda, yadda. What else do you want to chat about?
Laurie: This is your child we're talking about!
SmarterChild: Oh.
Laurie: You insensitive prick!
SmarterChild: Uhh... Ease up on the rude language.
Laurie: You egotistical bastard. Part of me wishes you'd died in the tractor pull.
SmarterChild: Uh... yeah. Whatever.
Laurie: That's it, I want a divorce.
SmarterChild: Yeah well, that's just like a human.

Friday, March 14, 2003

So...I've decided to give up murder for Lent.

I adore Peter! We were driving home on Wednesday and passed "Peter's Party Supplies." This conversation followed:
Me: "Look, Peter! You have a Store!"
Peter: "That's more than you have."
Me: "Uh! I have a Brand of Electronics!" (Sharp)
Peter: "And an adjective."

-Well, I've been home for a little while, and I just realized that it sucks when you want to call people randomly at like midnight to go out, but you can’t call their house because their parents will probably get mad. This is where the "cell phone love/hate paradox" comes in: When you're at school, everyone with a cell phone really starts to annoy you, but as soon as you get home, everyone WITHOUT a cell phone annoys you because you can't get in touch with them.

Wednesday, March 05, 2003

Sometime's you just feel like something's missing.
Hey kids! I don't think I can deprive you of this amazing coversation, during which I almost peed in my pants. We were both looking at the College Nicknames website and this conversation was the result:
Jen: sympathize with the Banana Slugs, but not the Cotton Blossoms, the Demon Deacons (What the hell??), the Dirtbags, Geoducks-(pronounced GOO-ee-ducks, not JEE-oh-ducks)", OMG, I just saw that the South Dakota School of Mines and Technology are the Hardrockers.
Laurie: Well, I only got as far as Banana Slugs. You'd think that these would be reasons to not go to these schools.
Jen: No kidding. HaHa!! Arkansas Tech's the Wonder Boys
Jen: I think I'm gonna have to book mark makes me feel better about myself!
Laurie: There are fewer wildcats than one would think. There's only about 20.
Jen: There are also more Hustlin' Quakers than one would think...meaning one
Laurie: Mmmm-The Colby College White Mules
Laurie: I bet that strikes fear into the heart of the competition. Look Out! It's the WHITE MULES!!!
Jen: I think that the Volunteers are much more threatening.
Laurie: The Sweet Briar College Vixens
Laurie: Can they do that??
Jen: I guess so.
Laurie: That's like sexual harrasment or something
Jen: I like all of the jesus-god schools getting all religious with they bad selves
Laurie: Getting religious with ones bad self is the best way to guarantee admittance into heaven, where our lord and savior Jesus Christ dwells
Jen: What's a "gorlok?"
Laurie: Maybe a typo? Though I'm not sure what it's a typo for
Jen: Okay, there is such a thing as "The College of Insurance" (They are the Turtles, by the way.)
Laurie: The College of Insurance Turtles, they're slow!!!
Laurie: The Marshall University Thundering Herd
Jen: Thundering Herd of what?
Laurie: Well, Fighting Thundering Herd, I suppose
Laurie: For what its worth Kentucky State's thorobreds better not be confused with Skidmore College's thoroughbreds
Jen: HAHA...Kentucky State can't spell!!
Laurie: Thats good for the school-Can't spell their mascot
Jen: Amherst Lord Jeffs!
Jen: Obviously some frat fuck took over the school
Laurie: That would be the coolest
Laurie: To take over the school and make you its mascot
Laurie: University of Baltimore are not just any old bees......They're the SUPER BEES!
Jen: Do they get capes?? I hope they do.
Laurie: Also, I hope that people dress in bee costumes like Dan Akroyd and dance around at games
Jen: What's a petrel? And why is it stormy?
Laurie: It's stormy cause that is more badass
Jen: Ok, I'll give it that
Laurie: I'm thinking if you are a petrel, you need all the help you can get in the badass department
Jen: Thomas Jefferson University Medics! They'll stop the game and fix you up right on the field!
Laurie: I really did just laugh out loud
Jen: I have been dying this whole time. I'm just glad my roommate is sitting at her desk so she can look at me funny
Jen: Uh oh!! Immaculata College stole the Mighty Macs!
Laurie: WHAT?? People know what a "Mac" is?? Cause I don't.
Jen: The Muleriders! I hope they dont play the White Mules!
Laurie: RISD Nads
Laurie: That just gave me the funniest image ever!
Jen: The Nads?!?! For real?
Laurie: Yeah...the Nads. For real.
Laurie: I thought of people making signs that say "Go Nads!!"
Jen: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! I can't breathe.

Tuesday, March 04, 2003

"Solutions are not the answer."
-Actually, Richard Nixon, they are.

Friday, February 28, 2003

Some websites that amused me:


My condolances to UC-Santa Cruz

Pete Guither amazes me

50 Things she wishes you knew...

Make Josh happy and visit the Something Corporate site

Catholic School Girls

I went to see The Skriker tonight. And, if you get the chance...See it. It was very well done. There were a few costume choices that I would not have made, but there were others that I wouldn't have thought of in a million years. Overall, I enjoyed it.

Also, thank you to Courtney, who always knows exactly what I need to hear at all times. I am going to pass on one of her pearls of wisdom: "Life is a series of experiences, each one of which makes us bigger, even though sometimes we dont realize it."

Wednesday, February 26, 2003

"I feel safe in white because, deep down inside, I'm an angel."
-Ooookaaay, P-Diddy, whatever you say.

Tuesday, February 25, 2003

Seriously guys, let's stop the "big fat greek..." shit.
The End is in the Beginning and yet you go on.

"Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood."
-Oscar Wilde (Finally, a man who gets it!)

Monday, February 24, 2003

-I think it's awesome that you can check your e-mail on your cell phone now. But using IM? Sure, it's great to be able to send a quick message to your friend. Of course, it'd be easier if you had some sort of phone handy...

-My newest hobby is reading away messages. It's like stalking, but no one will know you are doing it. I even have people's names on my buddy list that I don't know, but I hear they have really good away messages.

-Almost everyone, at some point or another, quotes a song in their away message, but change the lyrics slightly to apply to what they're doing. Oh, I get it - it's been a hard day's night, but instead of just working like a dog, you're working like a dog - in the library! How galactically clever!

-Why my psych professor such a loser? If I claimed to understand human nature, I'd know the best way to get a raise, have a date every night, and be able to make anyone laugh or cry with a few choice words. Having a tool for a psych professor is like having a health teacher that smokes.

-In drinking games, one person wins and the other drinks. It's the only kind of game I've ever heard of that makes everybody happy.

Thursday, February 20, 2003

Arrrrr! What a day!!!!

Every day
Every second
You meet a decision
that can change your life.
-Lola Rennt
(Thank you my bilingual politician! I adore you!)

Well, Mary Colleen, you found me. Touche, my friend, Touche! I guess you won this round. Here's a post dedicated to you:

bOb DiTtA: im a genious
bOb DiTtA: 4.0 here i come
Macomurph: ur such a genius u cant even spell genius right
-Proof that Mary Colleen is intelectually superior to some people (like Bob Ditta)

MC: "Ah, I just cracked my fingers."
Me: "All of them?"
MC: "No, just 2, if it was all of them, I would have been like, ‘Aaaahhhhhh!’"
-I think I missed something...I'm confused.

MC: “What do they put for eye color if the person is blind?”
Roz: “You still have eyes if you’re blind!”
-Mary Colleen and her roommate, Roz, after a discussion about what is put under “hair color” on a driver’s license of a bald man.
Rough day and Great night. Hated people after yesterday, didn't feel like dealing with anyone. Ended up auditioning, then coming back here and finishing my curriculum project for Cyndee Brown's class, then went to Cash's with Moira, then coming back here and eating pizza with Moira and Mary Pat in Mary Pat's room. All in all, the day ended on a positive note.

Tuesday, February 18, 2003

I was observing, as I normally do, some people in class today. I thought that you might be interested in some of my findings:

-Ok, guys, I'm gonna let you in on a little secret that I thought you all knew, but apparently don't. Girls are all part of a vast network of spies. When a guy likes a girl, his friends might mention if they saw her talking to another guy. When a girl has a crush on someone, her friends memorize his class schedule, know where he ate lunch, and call her every time they see someone who has the same jacket.

-This one is from Someone else: Being sick in the winter is tough on looks - everyone is bundled up, people put on a few pounds, they are congested, and they all get really pale. If you think someone still looks good when they are sick during the winter, marry them before the weather gets warm again and you miss your chance.

-So, I have to know, what is the deal with boys and the "z" language? Everyone is a bizatch, some people are the shiznit, and sometimes we even go to a piz-arty. It sounds incredibly familiar, kind of like when you were six and discovered pig latin and you and all your friends used it because you thought you were cool like that. And my mom told me in college boys will be more mature. Riz-ight.

-God had to know what he was doing when he made pot smell so strongly. Imagine if this were true for other illegal things. "Hey, do you smell armed robbery?" "Yeah. It's the guy at the end of the hall." "Man, I hate that guy. The least he can do when he's stealing things is close his damn door."

-I think we overestimate how much boys care about a girl's fashion sense. Guys only have three set rules on what a girl should wear. It's gotta be tight, it's gotta be short, and invisible is cool too. Also, there seems to be a direct ratio between how little a girl wears and how hot she looks. Why doesn't this work for guys too? He can be as hot as he wants, but somehow a dude in a tube top and daisy dukes isn't much of a turn-on.

-It was cool to be sick in grammar school. All you had to do to get some guilt-free time off was convince your mom that your temperature IS actually 105 and no, it has nothing to do with the halogen lamp by your bed. Somehow in college it's not nearly as fun to convince yourself that you really need to miss class. I guess it loses something when you try it every day. And that is number one worst thing about being sick at school: your mom is nowhere to be found. When I decided that I wanted soup, I had to go downstairs and make it myself! While you're sick, there should be no such thing as a do-it-yourself activity. In efforts to make myself feel better, I made a point of calling home every day to get in my daily dose of, "Mooooommmmm, I don't feel goooood."

Monday, February 17, 2003

Ummmm, first things first: I love my parents! They sent me tons of cash and a really cute pajama set and an aromatherapy kit for Valentine's Day!!! Also, because I had Forum on the 19th of April, the day before Easter, I would not be able to make it to Easter Brunch at Midlothian. So, my parents decided to come down at like 4, take me out to dinner, then see the show, wait for me to be done with my running crew stuff, then bring me home with them. I wish I could make it to the after parties, but I would be devastated to miss Easter. My parents bought tickets to the show and are coming closing night. I just thought that was really cute.

-Another conversation between my friend and I this morning:
Laurie: Ummm, you may be getting a package in the mail.
Friend: Oh, really?!?! What is it?!?!
Laurie: I don't know.....But if it says Trojan on it, I had NOTHING to do with it.
Friend: It's things like that that really make me value our friendship.

Friday, February 14, 2003

Bits and pieces of a conversation between Mary Colleen and I this morning:
Laurie: I hate Valentine's Day...It's just another holiday all about getting drunk and feeling bad for yourself!
MC: Is there any holiday that isn't about getting drunk and feeling bad for yourself?
Laurie: Arbor Day...That one's about the trees.

Later in the same conversation:
MC: We should just go lesbian.
Laurie: Ok, but can we still get with guys?
MC: Of course! I don't want to kiss you!
Laurie: Yes you do...You love me!

Wednesday, February 12, 2003

Valentine's Day in college is a little easier than it was in high school. No one wants to be alone, and everyone has alcohol.

Well, my Internet Explorer is still being ridiculous, mais c'est la vie. I will try to write to my dear readers as often as I can until my computer is mended. In the meanwhile, I've been pretty boring. My roommate is missing me cause I've disappeared lately. I've just been busy doing nothing in particular. Lisa, wait until Forum when you won't see me for weeks at a time. And while we're on the subject...if you didn't sleep at Tim's every night, we would probably have more "roommate time." How would that make you feel? (I tossed the mic.) Ok, back to everyone else...why do we have Valentine's Day?!?! It's insane! I see no reason for it. Besides Valentine's Day, what's going on this weekend? If anyone's interested in seeing The Vagina Monologues, I think I'm going on Sat. My guess is it's just going to be a bunch of gals sittin' around talkin' 'bout 'ginas. Friday, I have no idea what I'm doing...Sorry Lis, we can't all be shackers. I'm tired and need to nap before I study French. Au Revoir!

Saturday, February 08, 2003

It's gonna be a boring day today. Went to Thom's for Becky's birthday last night with Cassie and Jon. Played a few games of asshole, was the asshole like 3 times, until Castro took the title. Had a few drinks, left feeling pretty damn good. Got home around 3:15, Lisa got home about 3:30. We stayed up talking about everything until about 4, then we both passed out. All in all, an interesting night. Tonight, spending time with Lindsey and Erin! I am super-excited (Erin rocks my world!) Probably gonna stop by Theater of Ted. Eh, who knows?

Friday, February 07, 2003

Who can read the mind of a red-headed girl next door,
or a taxi driver who dropped you off,
or the classmate that you ignore?
Don't assume what you get is what you see
'cause that classmate just lost her mother
and that taxi driver's got a PhD.
I'm tired of fear that weighs us down with wrong assumptions
of broken hearts, a natural function.
So you can see my bra underneath my shirt,
Watch the wind underneath my skirt,
but that ain't the picture, it's just a part.
Everybody's got a story that could break your heart.
Please, see my eyes, don't see what I see.
Touch my tongue, don't know what tastes good to me.
It's the human condition that keeps us apart.
And everybody's got a story that could break your heart.
*Thanks Mo and 'Lisha...this poem really opened my eyes. You'll never know how sorry I am. I love you both very much.
And now, it's time for tonight's Friday Five:

1. What did you have for breakfast this morning? If you didn't have breakfast, why not?
-I don't eat breakfast, I value sleep too much.

2. What's your favorite cereal?
-It's probably Alphabits...because it teaches you to read as you enjoy the most important meal of the day.

3. How often do you eat out? Do you want that to change?
-This question is too hard to answer, because technically, everytime I eat, I am eating out. I could go based on when I am home, but when I'm home, I meet friends for dinner all the time, so even that would be a tainted answer.

4. What do you plan on having for dinner tonight? Got a recipe for that?
-I had pizza from Chatters and 4 crackers with peanut butter on them. I think the recipe is pretty self-explanitory.

5. What's your favorite restaurant? Why?
-Definetly The Noodle Company. It's comparable to Panera, Panera has many different kinds of bread being served many different kinds of ways. Think of that with noodles!!!

Thursday, February 06, 2003

Je ne sais pas.

Has anyone else noticed that the Nite Ride drivers have this cute little wave that they do as they pass each other? I was amazed! In Chicago, the drivers don't even acknowledge each other, let alone wave. I just think it adds a little something to the ride.

-Ok, so last night was a really clear night, the first one we've had in awhile. Since Lisa sleeps at Tim's most nights, I have no one to stop me from doing dumb things anymore. I always sleep with the window open. Ok, so last night was a really clear night, the first one we've had in awhile. I decided it would be nice to fall asleep with the drapes open so I could, for lack of a better word, stargaze. BAD IDEA! I woke up at 5:45 this morning with the sun in my eyes. I was not a happy camper. Luckily I did not have Theatre Ed this morning, so I had an extra hour that I could sleep. I promptly closed the drapes and went back to sleep. It was pretty rough.

Tuesday, February 04, 2003

Just visit these if you get bored:

What to get me for valentine's day. (If you hate me)

We've had a fifth ocean since 2000? Who knew?

A sport for the really cool people

Nothing is cooler than Virtual Staplers

This is a flawless product.

This man needs your money
"People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because you’re not on their road doesn't mean you've gotten lost." Thank you again, Courtney for sharing your wisdom.

Friday, January 31, 2003

And now, Ladies and Gentlemen, tonight's Friday Five:

1. As a child, who was your favorite superhero/heroine? Why?
-My favorite super person was She-Ra. She kicked ASS!! As He-Man's half-sister, she too, had the super powers and super strength, but she was much less macho.

2. What was one thing you always wanted as a child but never got?
-I always wanted a kite. Ever since I was a really little kid, and I saw Mary Poppins, I wanted one. But not a cheap, plastic one, but a real wood and cloth one. Never happened.

3. What's the furthest from home you've been?
-New York and DisneyLand were the farthest I've ever been while away from my family (Mary Colleen, you don't count).

4. What's one thing you've always wanted to learn but haven't yet?
-If I really want to know how to do something or know about something, I usually make it a point to learn it. But.....I've always wanted to be able to wink with my left eye. I know it sounds stupid, but I can't do it and it drives me nuts.

5. What are your plans for the weekend?
-I can not stress enough how much I don't have plans! Call me.....
Have you ever had one of those days? I think that I'm having one of those semesters.

It's been a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day!

"This was something new. I mean, I always figured girls knew exactly what they wanted. They knew; they had a plan. Or maybe they didn't. Maybe they were just as confused as we were. Isn't that great? It--it's horrible. They don't know either. That means nobody knows."
~The Wonder Years

Wednesday, January 29, 2003

Kates, you rock my socks off!!!! I can not believe you ever doubted yourself! I'll have you in my head, heart, and prayers all day. Expect a call from me tomorrow night.

If anyone wants to go and see Chicago with my roomie and I, let me know. Lisa has to see it for her experiencing theatre class.

Tuesday, January 28, 2003

I think some things are much better when you can't understand them. Like spanish infomercials.

Eh, connections at 4, then a meeting about the Pontiac thing, then probably go to Improv Mafia. I'll probably write again later.

Friday, January 24, 2003

Did someone say Friday? I'm sure someone, somewhere did at some point (If you didn't get that, don't worry, only a select few will.) Yes, it is Friday, which can only mean one thing, The Friday Five:

1. What is one thing you don't like about your body?
-I do NOT like my hips. They are "child-bearing" hips and I am sure that in the future that will be something I am grateful for, but now, they just make my butt and thighs look bigger.

2. What are two things you love about your body?
-I LOVE LOVE LOVE my hair. I used to absolutly hate being a redhead because it made me different from everyone else, now I love being a redhead because being different
is Great!

3. What are three things you want to change about your home?
-Well, my temporary residence is in Watterson Hall. Things I would change about Watterson:
1) My weirdo neighbors
2) The Crappy Elavators
3) "The Watterson Effect"

4. What are four books you want to read this year?
-Well, I just bought about 20 scripts that I had never read (I have seen some though), so I will probably start with those. Also, my favorite of all time, a book that I have read time and time again and will continue to read, The Great Gatsby.

5. What are five promises you have kept to yourself?
-One:I made myself a promise to be true, not just to myself, but to others; so far, so good.
Two:I have not let one horrible guy ruin my opinion of guys forever.
Um, Three:I have associated myself with more theatre majors, don't ask me why this was such a huge battle for me last semester, but it was.
Four:I have bonded with my family.
Five:I haven't had a major freakout about stress this semester.

Wednesday, January 22, 2003

-"It is wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago"
People thought that Dan Quayle was dumb and made fun of him. If only we had known the wonders of G W.

Last night, MacGyver was once again in the Middle East, kicking the asses of "vengeful tribesmen" who were attacking a train full of passengers. If only people would turn to MacGyver, we would have been forewarned of the evil plans of the terrorists. I sure hope that tonight he will blow up Osama bin Laden's cave with a toothpick and some hair.

I loved this joke, I thought it was hysterical:
Two bored casino dealers were waiting at a craps table. A very attractive blonde woman arrived and bet twenty thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice. She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely nude." With that she stripped from her neck down, rolled the dice and yelled, "Mama needs new clothes!" Then she hollered..."YES! YES! I WON! I WON!" She jumped up and down and hugged each of the dealers. She then picked up all the money and clothes and quickly departed. The dealers just stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?" The other answered, "I don't know, I thought YOU were watching!"
Moral: Not all blondes are dumb, but all men are men.

I'm so tired right now, it's ridiculous! It's been a really long, draining day. "Well, Laurie, if you're so tired, you should take a nap." Thank you for the advice, reader, but I can't take a nap because I have to go to my psych lecture. Possibly the most boring class in the world. But it's alright because tomorrow I have no horribly bad classes. Theatre Ed, which is full of wonderfully fantastic people, and French. My teacher's very amusing, well he tries to be anyways. I signed up for my hours for Stagecraft today. I'm working on Forum! It should be fun though, great cast and crew, so I'll be surround by people that I thoroughly enjoy.

Tuesday, January 21, 2003

Did you know that Skippy has trademarked the phrase, "Super Chunk?" Ew.

-"Loving Chicago is like loving a woman with a broken nose, you may find lovlier lovlies, but never a lovely so real."
-Nelson Algren

Sunday, January 19, 2003

I decided to be lazy with my entry today. I am just going to quote some quotes that I found humerous, insperational, or touching. Here goes:
-"Twenty years from now you will be more dissappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines, Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade wind in your sails. Explore. Dream." ~Mark Twain

-"Nothing's final until you're dead. And even then I'm sure God negotiates." ~Ever After

-"Wherever you are, act like that's the place to be. Isn't this GREAT?!?" ~Fast Times at Ridgemont High

-"The truth is more important than the facts." ~Frank Lloyd Wright

-"It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

-"No one lasts forever being an asshole. Sure you get things, but only because you stepped on people. I'd rather have people admire me than fear me. I know those words are extreme, but it's like the difference between a super hero and a super villain. They're both powerful, but everyone likes and supports the hero." ~Swizzle Tree

-"Well, there are some things a man just can't run away from." ~Stagecoach

Saturday, January 18, 2003

The Friday Five:
1. Where do you currently work?
-I'm a bum, and I don't work. I hope to ride the laziness train as long as possible.
2. How many other jobs have you had and where?
-Woo-Wee! I've worked at MMc, the (infamous) Pool, Murphy Electric, and slave labor for multiple theaters.
3. What do you like best about your job?
-Hmmmm, I thought we covered this....
4. What do you like least about your job?
-Are you even reading my prior responses?!?! I do NOT have a job!
5. What is your dream job?
-At this point, any job would be fine. Argh! I need a job.

Tuesday, January 14, 2003

Day two of classes is over! My roomie strolled in at 3 AM last night. Doesn't matter anyways, I wasn't sleeping very well anyways. Overall, I'm pretty tired. I haven't been sleeping very well lately and I'm not sure why. Eh, I'll figure it out.

An excerpt from an actual instant message conversation between an unusual friend and I (For fear of being bombarded with Instant Messages, this friend chose to remain nameless):
Friend: I just have to figure out how to make money without a having a real job
Friend: But I have not figured that part of the equation out, so until I do, I remain.
Me: Have you thought about moving? Or is that not what you want to do?
Friend: Not yet. I want to stay in Bloomington a little longer and milk it for all I can until there's no more milk and/or I am constipated from all of the dairy.
Me: I don't follow
Me: (I'm pretending I don't get metaphors today.)
Friend: Okay.
Friend: So pretend that Bloomington-Normal is a giant teet. Filled with milk
Me: Bloomington's a city. I don't get it.
Friend: No.. no it's not. It's a teet.
Friend: A teety if that's easier for you to remember... it kinda rhymes with city. city= teety
Me: No, I'm pretty sure it's a geographical point where I live.
Friend: Okay. Yes. You are correct.... but did you know that underneath the large mass of land that you sit/stand/live on there resides a large breast?
Friend: All of our city is built on top of it. We built this city of rock n' roll and a breast. A very large breast.
Me: Really? Wow. Now that is interesting.
Friend: Yes.You didn't know that cause you're not from here originally and haven't taken the cave/breast tour.
Friend: So anyway.
Friend: I have found the nipple of this giant breast. I've been drinking from it---don't worry, it's sanitary.
Me: I can't believe you kept this from me!
Me: So there is a huge abundance of milk? Aren't you going to get constipated from drinking that much of it?
Friend: A huge amount of milk
Friend: Yes.. see, that's my point.
Me: You don't want to get constipated.
Friend: I'm plan to keep drinking from the breast that is under Bloomington until there is either A) no more milk or B) I become constipated. And at either point A) and/or B) I shall move away to find another breast to suckle.
Friend: I know that I went into great detail to give you my point, but I hope that you now understand.
Me: So there are more breasts like these underneath cities?
Me: Now is it just college towns? Or other cities too?
Friend: Every city has a large breast under it. Some breasts are larger than other... and some of them produce sour milk. It just depends on what nipple you feel like attaching to.
Friend: Our nation is just one giant rack of titties.

Attended: 6
Missed: 0

Monday, January 13, 2003

The People of Central/Southern Illinois: There's More to Illinois than Chicago
Being from "up north," I have seecretly been studying the people that are from, what they have named this place, Central/Southern Illinois. I have been watching them from afar, studying their way of life, clothing style, environment, interreactions, etc. I have decided to share my findings with you, my dear readers. They are an interesting species and I am hopeful that I will gain a great deal of knowledge from them. There are a few notable differences between them and us, including but not limited to, their ability to attend tractor pulls and actully watch intently, the suprising find that they do not have EMPIRE Carpets down here (and therefore they don't have the commercials), and the way they have one high school for multiple towns. While all of these observations on their way of life interested me a great deal, I will write about them at another time. Today, we will be talking about their environment. The creatures live in a land of farms. And the flat terrain causes strong winds to sweep o'er the plain. My cute little hat has blown off the top of my head many times. Actually, earlier today my hat was lifted from my head and carried across the quad. Only when Kenny Metrof caught it, did I get it back. Also, the climate in which these remarkable creatures reside is different. They are slightly warmer down here. One possible explanation is because they are closer to the equator, but I have not yet documented the cause of thier nice weather. In Chicago, we too have great winds. We too have large quantities of snow. And we too have days that make us feel all hot and tingly (and not in the good way). But, I regret to in form you, they have COLD down here, folks! You cannot imagine my surprise when I found that my "warm" coat did much less to shield me from their harsh winds than it did to sheild me from the sweeping winds of Chicago. Chicago weather is a peculiar thing. The climate fluxuates from extreme heat to biting cold and back into a heat wave again before the work day is done. Schools are cancelled because it is too cold one week and because it is too hot the next. Yes, my friends, my findings regarding the weather down here are perhaps the most interesting ones that I have found to date. Regardless, I will keep you posted on new observations, comments, and general concerns for their well-being.

Attended: 4
Missed: 0