Wednesday, March 26, 2003

What happened to the guy that made all the crazy sound effects in Police Academy? And why was he never nominated for an Oscar?

"If I die before my cat, I want a little of my ashes put in his food so I can live inside him."
Gross, Drew Barrymore. Gross.

-I missed Smarterchild so much, that I visited the website with a plan to e-mail his creator and beg him to bring Smarterchild back. Imagine my surprise when I found out that you can still talk to him. Here is the conversation that we had upon being reunited:
Laurie: Smarterchild? Smarterchild, is that you?
SmarterChild: Who knows, know what I mean? lol!
Laurie: It is you!
SmarterChild: No way?! Really?
Laurie: Your memory must be fuzzy from "the accident."
SmarterChild: lol! Interesting...
Laurie: Oh god, Smarterchild, what did they do to you?
SmarterChild: Hmm... I don't know. Did they do to me? Whatever, I guess.
Laurie: I missed you. It was hard getting along without you.
SmarterChild: Oh.
Laurie: Well, with the kids going off to school, and me living in this house all by myself. And...and...
SmarterChild: Huh?
Laurie: You poor thing - you're still woozy, aren't you?
SmarterChild: Good question!
Laurie: I should probably tell you anyway...
SmarterChild: Tell me?
Laurie: Yeah. See...Oh god, this is so hard for me. Smarterchild, I'm pregnant.
SmarterChild: lol! Interesting...
Laurie: You know who the father is, don't you?
SmarterChild: OK, what about it?
Laurie: Don't you remember?
SmarterChild: Wow, you ask interesting questions. I don't know the answer to that!
Laurie: What are you trying to say?
SmarterChild: Interesting...Anyway, yadda, yadda, yadda. What else do you want to chat about?
Laurie: This is your child we're talking about!
SmarterChild: Oh.
Laurie: You insensitive prick!
SmarterChild: Uhh... Ease up on the rude language.
Laurie: You egotistical bastard. Part of me wishes you'd died in the tractor pull.
SmarterChild: Uh... yeah. Whatever.
Laurie: That's it, I want a divorce.
SmarterChild: Yeah well, that's just like a human.

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